DM5: The Awesome Geriatric Enormous Dispute (A.G.E.D.)

...Joyce reached out and grabbed "Madam Death" by the hair. She pulled M. Death forward and off of balance. As the shaken M. Death was pulled forward Joyce jerked her knee up swiftly into M. Death's face. Joyce began to knee M. Death repeatedly in the face with complete abhorrence.

M. Death could feel the pain each time the knee was brought into her face. Without a second thought she reached up and grabbed the hair pins that held her wig in place. Joyce tumbled to the ground. She wasn't expecting this to happen. M. Death jumped back and pulled out her weapon of choise. From her pocket (it's a big pocket) she pulled out her trusty cane. The cane was a simple piece of wood with a small metal handle at the end. In the hands of M. Death, this could kill. Like a fencer of the greatest skill, M. Death began to thrust and perry like no person has ever seen. Joyce used all the skills she had aquired in her years to keep just inches beyond the tip of that cane. The whole time she searched for a way to attack. The defencive side of a fight was a good place to be, but it would never win in a deathmatch. M. Death continued to jab at Joyce, ever-searching for that one fatal blow. Then Joyce saw it.

Joyce's mind had decided that it was time to use the Charlie family method of "cheating". Her eyes had come to rest on the neck of M. Death. Her aim was the windpipe. Joyce knew her timing would have to be perfect because she would only get one try. If she missed M. Death would not make the same mistake again.

On a particularly long thrust M. Death was brought slightly off balance for just a second. Joyce took her shot. As M. Death charged forward, Joyce jumped to the side to avoid getting hit by the cane. Then she swung her hand, in the motion of a "karate chop" directly at M. Death's neck. Contact.

M. Death fell to the ground desperatly gasping for air. As she fell, so too did her cane. Joyce quickly kicked the cane off to the side of the fighting ground. Now it was Joyce who would try to end this fight.

While M. Death was still on the ground trying to regain her wind Joyce threw a pack of bird seed on her. Joyce stepped back and called to her winged friends. Soon hundreds of birds came from every direction and converged on their new feeding ground. The birds pecked at seed and skin.

M. Death could feel the birds all over her. She tried to cover her face the best she could. Every time she managed to get a bird off of her it seemed like a hundred more took it's place. Then she remembered a move she had learned a few years ago. Although she had only used it once she was certain it would work here. Several years befor she had used her "No" attack to escape from the great Charlie. Now she would use it again to save herself from Joyce. M. Death gathered her streangth and then released. She stood quickly and flung her arms out to her sides and yelled "No!" as loud as possible. With an amazing display of Psytokenisis the birds were sent flying through the air, but not by their choice.

M. Death now pulled her next weapon from her other pocket (it's just as big as the other). Her new weapon was a giant purse filled with lead weights. M. Death swung the purse a few times then hurled it at Joyce. The weighted bag hit Joyce with a crushing blow. Now it was Joyce who was on the ground trying to regain her breath.

In a final attempt to weaken M. Death befor the death blow was delivered, Joyce removed her Orthopedic Shoes and began to beat M. Death with them. Once she was satified that M. Death was no longer a real threat she backed away.

Now would come and end to all.

To be Continued...

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